Are you ready to discover new landscapes of pleasure that can be shared with your partner? A dildo in your bedroom specifically serves as a great tool to deepen some form of intimacy; discovering various sensations is part of what makes it so appealing. Spending quality time together, physically and emotionally, is something both parties can aim for. What would you feel if a simple toy could unlock that near perfect level of excitement and subsequent connection around you? Using a dildo together opens up so many possibilities - tantalizing teases, shared (at least partially) orgasms, the more 'weirdly beautiful' adventure style experiences we all dream of. Discovery is a large part of it.
We have tucked a good deal of creative, yet practical ideas into this guide. This session will focus on incorporating the dildo into team play (of any and all definitions thereof). Every possible level of comfort is covered; inspiration is the end goal. Fun, pure and simple, is what we are after. Jumping in now would be ideal.
Why Bring a Dildo into Partnered Play?
Before we jump into the "how," let's talk about the "why." Introducing a dildo can amplify pleasure for everyone involved. Replacing anything or someone is not the goal; adding another layer of some form of sensation, a near constant 'newness' to your sexual repertoire is what I believe is sought after.
A dildo can help you:
- Explore simultaneously various new sensations.
- Achieve (at least partially) different types of orgasms.
- Provide that all important visual element - incredibly hot to see at times.
- Freeing up hands for other more all encompassing types of touch.
"Introducing a dildo was a game changer for us. Opened up proper conversations between us, what each of us enjoys specifically. Connected, fun sex is the end result we both craved. Spicing things up is still our favorite part." - A truly happy couple.
Getting Started: Communication is Key
The most important step is talking about it. Bringing a toy into bed should not be a surprise. Have an open, enthusiastic conversation beforehand. Sharing curiosities (of any and all kinds) and listening to your partner is part of this process. Both of you needing to be on the same page is what makes the subsequent exploration so much more enjoyable. Framing it as some sort of shared adventure - a new "us" activity - helps put everything into perspective.
Start with as many open ended questions as possible:
- "I was thinking it could be fun to try a dildo together. What do you think?"
- Have them ever been curious about toys during sex?
- What specific new sensations would they be interested in exploring with you?
Honesty is the goal, safe or otherwise. The very first interactions should be and feel like a true team effort.
Fun and Creative Ways to Use a Dildo Together
Ready for some inspiration? Here are various fun ways to use a dildo with your partner. Ranging from simple gentle exploration all the way to more 'advanced' forms of play.
The Ultimate Foreplay Tool
Think of the dildo as a near magic wand for foreplay. Exploring each other's bodies in new ways is part of what makes this so enjoyable; building that all important anticipation.
External Teasing: Gently trace the dildo over your partner's skin. Gliding it along inner thighs, stomach, and/or chest is perfect for this. The smooth surface creates those delightful small scale sensations. A glass dildo if I may say so, warmed or cooled for temperature play, is ideal.
Clitoral & Perineal Stimulation: One partner receiving oral, or simply being kissed, can have the other use the dildo for near constant targeted stimulation. Layering different sensations is mind blowing.
Double the Pleasure: Some Form of Simultaneous Stimulation
What if both parties could experience said incredible sensations at the same time? A dildo makes this possible.
Side by side fun: Masturbating with (or taking turns using) each other's toys is intimate enough to be desired. Watching and being watched adds to the experience.
Penetrative Sex specifically: This is a near classic. The giving partner penetrates, the receiving one uses a dildo (clitoral being the prime example) for that all encompassing, split attention type orgasm. Missionary position or otherwise, both partners will feel and/or achieve a real, full blown joyous orgasm.
Hands Free Fun with a Suction Cup Dildo (to me at least, a dream)
A suction cup dildo opens up a universe of possibilities by freeing up everyone's hands for more touching, kissing, and various forms of exploring.
Shared Riding: Secure the suction cup dildo to a sturdy surface - a shower wall, headboard, stool being perfect examples. One partner rides the dildo while the other kisses, caresses, or in any other way stimulates them. Taking turns is also a possibility, the hot visual of this being especially enjoyable for both.
New Positions: Mounting the dildo on the floor allows for near infinite positions. One partner on their hands and knees over it, the other behind for rear entry is just one example. Double penetration style situations can be created.
Harness Play for Shared Penetration
A harness allows one partner to 'wear' a dildo, all sorts of giving and receiving dynamics are possible. Gender or anatomy independent, this is a truly empowering tool.
Pegging: Using a strap on (of any description) to penetrate a partner is intimate and to me at least, pleasurable. Flipping traditional roles is part of what makes it so beautiful.
Mutual Penetration: Harnesses can be used in vaginal or anal sex, both partners experiencing some form of double filled sensation.
Double Ended Dildo
A double ended dildo is the near perfect all rounder for partnered play. Shared feelings and/or face to face connection are the end goals of all of the above, and a double ended toy brings all of it together in a physical and emotional sense.
Scissoring or not, two people can always share a single experience of mutual pleasure.
Choosing Your Dildos: A Quick Guide
What's your favorite dildo? So many fun ways to play! What you want to explore together depends on you.
|
Dildo Type |
How to Use It with a Partner |
Perfect For... |
|---|---|---|
|
Classic Dildo |
Foreplay, mutual masturbation, clitoral stimulation during sex. |
Beginners and anyone looking for a versatile, all-around toy. |
|
Glass Dildo |
Temperature play during foreplay, G-spot or P-spot stimulation. |
Couples who want to explore new sensations and enjoy an elegant, hygienic toy. |
|
Suction Cup Dildo |
Hands-free play, shower sex, riding, and exploring new positions. |
Creative couples who want to free up their hands for more touching. |
|
Strap-On/Harness |
Pegging, double penetration, role-playing, exploring power dynamics. |
Partners looking to explore new ways of giving and receiving pleasure. |
|
Double-Ended Dildo |
Mutual penetration, scissoring, simultaneous pleasure. |
Intimate, face-to-face play and shared sensations. |
Final Thoughts on Shared Pleasure
When you bring a dildo into your relationship, you can embark on a journey of discovery that is exciting and captivating. I believe that sex is a way for a couple to communicate desires, to explore new sensations, and to add a unique twist to their sexual relationship. Keep things fun, playful, and centered on mutual enjoyment and you'll be able to make it work.
The first thing that you should do is select what feels exciting to you both, keep the lines of communication open, and get ready to relish new depths of intimacy and pleasure together. There is no limit to the adventures you will be able to have with your new toy.
